Someone is talking behind your back and spreading lies about you. When I was younger, I would have come out of my corner fighting mad. This is not the way God says to handle ourselves. Even if you say nothing, but allow anger to take over your heart, it is not how we are to handle ourselves. By allowing these feelings you have allowed them to steal your peace and your joy.
Psalm 34:13-14 Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit. Depart from evil and do good; Seek peace and pursue it.
There are four important truths in that verse. The first one is to keep your tongue from evil. We are to speak what is truth. That truth is to be in a beautiful tone and say only what is necessary to say. Second we are not to be deceitful. We most definitely do not twist what is said. Third, we do not repay with evil, but we are to do good. We should tell them that we will pray for them and ask God to bless them. Now, there are at lease two ways they will respond to those words. One, they will say that they do not want you to pray for them. Now you told them you would pray, so do just that. You can pray later but be sure you do pray. You should already be praying. Just be sure your words are true and pray. The second way they may respond is with quietness. With this response, the Lord may be starting to work within them. The fourth thing in this verse is to seek peace and to pursue it. In Matthew 5:9, “Blessed are the peace makers for they shall be called sons of God.”
Matthew 12:36: And I say to you, that every careless word that men shall speak, they shall render account for it in the day of judgment.
One needs to read all of Ephesians. In Ephesians 1:4B reads, “we should be holy and blameless before Him in love.”
Remember, God says we are to live in harmony with others. We are to show love. We are to show compassion. We are to be humble. It is through these things that an unbeliever can see Christ. We are to be representatives of Christ. We are to keep God’s name Holy and bring Him glory. Gossip and lies about a child of God is a very serious wrong doing.
If the targeted christian continues in love and does not retaliate, the Lord will step in. I know a pastor and family that became a target in the church. It started with one person and spread to half of the church. It became unbearable for this pastor and family. This family left. A few weeks later, the person who started the unrest found out that she had cancer of the tongue.
Beloved, take your concern and lay them at the Lord’s feet. Continue in love with the church. If a pastor is wrong in his actions and words, go to Him privately with love for Christ. If his response is not holy, lay it at the feet of Jesus. Do not talk about the pastor or his family. Turn it over to God and quietly leave that church. The main thing is to keep God’s name holy.
Matthew 5:13 “You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor, and hate your enemy. But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you in order that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes the sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward have you? Do not even the tax-gatherers do the same? And if you greet your brothers only, what do you do more than others. Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”
Even if you are not a mature christian, you are told to accept the call to be perfect. We are not to be followers of money and titles. Yes, one has to work to provide for a family. You do not have to let it consume you. We are to let God consume us and follow love, kindness, integrity, humility and generosity. These thing move God.
“And the Lord’s bond servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged with gentleness, correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to there senses and escape from the snare of the Devil having been held captive by him to do his will.” 2 Timothy 2:24-26
We are to bless others. That person may be a stranger, a friend or an enemy. Let your words be like the words of Jesus. His words always healed. We must fill our hearts with Christlike love for others.
When we are attacked, we can produce fruit. Fruit of bitterness, hurt, anger, hatred and other fruit. Christlike love must fill our heart so that Satan’s fruit will not settle in the heart. One must learn how to have the Holy Spirit live fully within them and have His power flow to others to restore, heal and free them from Satan’s power over them.
Remember this when someone is talking behind your back. Many times it is someone you think is a friend. You may think it is OK to feel offensive and not forgive. They are convinced these feelings are OK. Don'[t let your heart deceive you. Holding on to unforgiveness and bitterness will cause your recovery to take longer. One does not have the right to hold on to hurt. Hurt can turn into many things including hate.
Surely, you do not want Christ to return and find hate in your heart. Anger causes the bones to rot. Also envy, jealousy,and many other things. Proverbs has no less than 10 passages dealing with this subject.
When someone talks behind your back, you feel betrayed. Then one may want to protect oneself at the cost of another by their tongue. This turns into not only anger but hatred. Remember what the Bible says about hatred. It is the same as murder. (I John 3:15, Matthew 5:44, I Peter 2:21-23. Please read these passages. Do not fight the Holy Spirit. Do everything you can to return to the fullness of the Holy Spirit within you. You must develop a stronger love for God . Let this push out any thoughts of the person words. Let the wounds of your heart be healed in the presence of God.